Preparing for Thanksgiving

This year we are having my husband’s daughter and her family down for Thanksgiving. Along with her and her family of four children, she is bringing down a boyfriend to meet her father.

They have been seeing each other for a least two years. Their relationship is getting serious. Her children like him, and his children like her, and the children like each other. A big positive for a relationship of blended families to work. Thanksgiving we are meeting the boyfriend.

A week ago, I was calling to confirm the dates they would be here to visit, and getting a commitment on staying at our house. My husband’s daughter, Ms. T, jokes just like her dad. I made some reply and heard him in the background with a reply and I said something back. Soon he was on speaker phone, and then he and I talked for two hours. He was mostly asking questions and learning about me and the farm.

It is common being nervous meeting the parents and vice versa, meeting in the boyfriend. At the beginning of the conversation with Ms. T, she was sharing about flying in an airplane to meet his family. She relayed we could fly to Colorado and visit them this summer. We were joking back and forth on why I do not fly anymore. I mentioned the reason being no place to escape during an anxiety attack when you are thousands of feet in the air, from the Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. He heard I had PTSD. He also has PTSD.

We had common ground. He began talking. He asked for me to share the event, I do not share the event. Then we discussed my triggers and his triggers, both of us wanting to avoid exposing the other to triggers during their visit. Then the conversation moved to horses, as he wants to learn how to be around and eventually get on a horse. From the horses the conversation evolved to nationalities, spiritualism and cooking. After two to three hours of conversation, he was excited to come for a visit. He was no longer nervous and wanting to be option of staying in a hotel. His last words of the conversation, “Yes, we will be staying at your house”.

I never thought a condition I suffer with daily, would be used to open the door for a relationship. This man is important to Ms. T and I am glad that with our conversation, he is more comfortable about coming down and meeting the father.

Now I am busy preparing the house for six people. Getting beds ready that have sit vacant for four months, dusting and clearing cobwebs out of the spare bedrooms, moving the extra boxes I have stored in one room to the storage building. Determining the menu and making sure there will be enough food and drinks for their visit.

I am even thinking of putting up the Christmas decorations early. As we will not have family here for Christmas, and Christmas is my favorite holiday. I am thinking of combining the Thanksgiving and Christmas in one celebration this year.

amtolle

Thankful for Family

November is the month we celebrate Thanksgiving Day. A day of celebrating with a feast, family and friends the events and things we are thankful for having in our lives.

I am thankful for family. This year I had a granddaughter born as well as three grandsons, a set of triplets. My children are finished increasing the size of their families. I am blessed and thankful for fifteen living grandchildren.

I am thankful for my spouse, my husband of thirteen years. I am so thankful he was not bothered when I was gone for two months helping my daughter and her family before and after the triplets were born. He took care of the farm and worked his job while I was away. He is always there to talk to and share my thoughts and feelings during the year. He handles my anxiety and quirky was like a pro.

This year my oldest daughter and her children visited us for the first time at the farm. Her children were able to learn some about riding horses from their granny. We made birdhouse and windchimes. The most important thing is we made memories.

Once again I was able to have my grandson, Mr. J, for a few weeks this summer. Mr. J came to live with me for several months when he was two years old. And he has visited me every summer for three to four weeks, except the first year of Covid. Needless to say we have a special relationship. We fish and ride the horses, garden, paint something and do a lot of talking. This year he is thirteen years old. We both realized that the summer visits will eventually come to an end. This year we truly cherished the weeks we had together.

There was sadness this year as well. My husband sister passed away due to cancer. My uncle passed away due to medical issues. Both of them are missed.

I am thankful for family.

amtolle