Lonely Holidays

The holiday celebrations of Thanksgiving and Christmas are approaching. For some those holidays are surrounded with family and friends. There are others who spend the holidays alone or only with a spouse.

Last year we were blessed with family and friends for Christmas feast, great conversation and just the presence of people in the home. This year it will only be my spouse and I to celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas. Family members have other places they need to be this year.

There have been many celebrations at our home with only my spouse and I to attend. A few years past, I decided not to put up decorations, reasoning was no one was coming to see or share. After three years of no decorations, I realized that regardless of who visits or does not, I still need to celebrate.

My husband and I have lived in our current residence for twelve years. In those twelve years we have not had one child, teenager or adult come to our home for trick-o-treating. There were children across the street, and down the road. No one came. I still buy candy, just in case I get a visitor on Halloween night. I still decorate, carve a pumpkin and enjoy the evening watching Harry Potter movies with my husband. We celebrate for ourselves.

Thanksgiving will be celebrated alone this year. My husband has to work the holiday. I will fix the traditional turkey dinner, give thanks, and we will have leftover for days. We are blessed with family, him having a job, the sheep doing well, and we have good health. Reasons to have a celebration of thanksgiving.

There is nothing wrong with celebrating the holidays alone. Most times we are depressed because the holiday is not what we had visioned. Other times it is missing loved ones who are unable to attend, or are no longer with us. Time changes our lives and those who we share it with. These changes do not mean we can not enjoy celebrating holidays, we just change our way of celebrating and start new different traditions.

When my husband’s son and family lived close, they have two boys, I started putting a train under the Christmas tree. Kids love trains under trees or just anywhere. I enjoyed the train. I also have the beginnings of a Christmas village, that is added to one item each year. Five years ago, I put the Christmas village and train together on an 8 foot X 4 foot board. Last year with all the people attending Christmas, I did not have room for my Christmas Village and train. Tonight, at dinner, I was discussing with my husband I think I can get the board with my train to sit over the couch, since no one will be here to sit on the couch, that way I have room for my train and village, and the Christmas tree. He just laughed.

Each year there is a laugh over our Christmas decorations. One big joke between us is that not everything on clearance at a really low price is the best item to buy. Three years ago, we were in Wal-Mart looking at Christmas clearance, after Christmas. There were 7 foot Christmas trees on sale for $25.00. I thought great, my old tree ( close to thirty years old) was showing some wear. We purchased the tree. The following year I went to put the tree up with a vision of putting the tree on our square coffee table with the train underneath. Vision burst when the tree was way too tall. It is a laugh each Christmas on where I am going to put the Christmas tree as there are limited places due to the angel or star hitting the ceiling. I am glad we have a vaulted ceiling.

Holidays can be lonely times. I was depressed that my visions of having a house full for holiday celebrations did not and would not happen. Last year was great. This year will be my husband and I. He has to work, and my daughter and her family will be staying home. I will still fix the traditional dinner of Navajo Tacos with green chilli. We will open gifts, maybe have some wine and watch ” A Wonderful Life” followed by “The Grinch”. Celebrating helps with the depression that arrives during the holidays, even if you have to celebrate alone or only with your spouse.

Life is a celebration, it is up to us to choose to celebrate Life.

amtolle